I spent almost all of my twenties waiting for something that never materialized—a marriage proposal. In the meantime, I did whatever I could to pass the waiting, including getting both a bachelor’s and master’s degree. To the untrained eye I appeared to be achieving goals and following my dreams; but those with more discerning vision were able to see that I was just biding my time, waiting for the ring at the end of the seven year old tunnel, so to speak. I’m not trying to take away from what I did—I’m proud of my educational accomplishments, but the truth is that my motivation all along has been matrimonial. And now I’m 29, single, and struggling to find a path for myself.

Oh, but this morning! This morning I found a new direction! The irony is that I have no idea where it leads. I was out for my usual walk along the canal when I stopped at a bench along the path to pray and meditate and sing. I do this often. And what I prayed for today was that God would guide my path—and that it not be an ordinary path. I prayed for God to manifest in extraordinary ways in my life. To me, this does not mean giving up my dream of marriage and a family, but that the shape of my dreams will change. During all the years I was warming the bench and twiddling my thumbs, God was preparing me for something bigger.

The last few years, since I survived the tsunami, I’ve developed a keen interest in feminist spirituality. This interest further developed in grad school to encompass women’s rights—at home, but especially in the international community. I feel strongly that God is going to use me in this capacity somehow—as an advocate or a teacher or whatever—to influence and empower women. I’ve got no idea how this is going to happen, but my heart and eyes are both wide open, and I’m searching for the right opportunity. I’m confident that I’ll find what I’m looking for, and I’m also confident that I may not find it right away. I feel like there’s still work to be done so that I’ll be truly prepared for the challenges that lie ahead for me. But I’m excited, and my new direction has given new purpose and meaning to my day. Whenever this path begins, wherever it leads, I’m ready.

Read More 1 Comment | Posted by Jenna